# sad dilemma



## traceyb (Nov 5, 2013)

I have had my gorgeous cockapoo puppy for just over a week and i think i am going to have to let her go  She is 11 weeks old and absolutely adorable. She has the sweetest, cuddliest temperament ever and is as good as gold but i have a chihuahua male at home and he has just not taken to her at all. He is growling and snapping at her constantly and it is making her very miserable indeed, she can't even move without him attacking her  He is used to being with a bigger, older dog who kept him in check but unfortunately our other dog passed away about a month ago so we decided to get Dolly our tri coloured cockapoo as a mate for him but it is just not working. He either needs to be on his own or with a bigger, older dog who will not let him be a bully.
Dolly comes from a KC show cocker mum and a KC toy poodle dad and she is a gorgeous bundle of fluff. She is fully innoculated, micro chipped and flea/wormed and is already going outside to the toilet a lot of the time. This is so sad for us but if anyone may be interested in having her please let me know.
Tracey


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## dio.ren (Jan 18, 2013)

How sad  I can only imagine how you must be feeling. No one in your family can take her? or a friend that you know well?


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## RuthMill (Jun 30, 2012)

Sorry to hear this. I am not sure you have given it enough time. Let your chihuahua know that he is top dog. Treat and greet him first. Give them their own space and attention and treat favourable behaviour. It may never work but I think you could definitely give it a chance for another while. There was another poster a few months back in a similar situation who is now in a much better place with her two dogs and they are now getting along. If you are going to give it a while longer then I wouldn't allow them to be in each other's company without someone else there, just to protect the puppy. 

I hope someone can come along and offer more advice. Would be good to have a resolution instead of losing your lovely puppy.


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## Milo moo (Sep 18, 2013)

This is very sad news indeed. 

I would recommend given it another week or so, he will need time to adjust. Make sure you give him as equal if not more amount of fuss than your puppy. Maybe give him some nice juicy meat bones and make him see the puppy doesn't get these type of treats. 

A guy at our dog classes has just got himself a little boy schnauzer cross and already had a 9 month old jack Russell girl, who is less than social. When he first started coming to class with his boy he would complain that the girl wouldn't let him play with the puppy without barking and growling, she would trap him in his bed with growling, but 4 weeks on and they are now getting along fine. He's bringing them both to terrible teen classes now. 

I know now it must seem impossible, but give it a little while longer. It would seem such a shame to have to get rid of your little Dolly. 

Sending you lots of luck.


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## Marzi (Sep 17, 2012)

This must be very hard for you and I'm sure that you will not take any decision lightly.
Dolly must be kept safe, but I would try and give yourself a big more time. Can yo keep the pup in the kitchen and only allow short periods of supervised access, with lots of high value treats to keep your chi's attention.
Soon Dolly will be bigger and heavier than him. For his long term safety ( in his eyes) he needs her to give him ample respect. Has he actually bitten her?
I think he needs to know you are top dog, not him and you will manage the puppy.
We need Von's advice here, as she had similar issues with her two, without the size issue.
I suggest you also speak with the breeder, your vet and also a recommended pet behaviourist. If you can commit the time I am sure you can resolve these early difficulties.


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## RuthMill (Jun 30, 2012)

Marzi said:


> This must be very hard for you and I'm sure that you will not take any decision lightly.
> Dolly must be kept safe, but I would try and give yourself a big more time. Can yo keep the pup in the kitchen and only allow short periods of supervised access, with lots of high value treats to keep your chi's attention.
> Soon Dolly will be bigger and heavier than him. For his long term safety ( in his eyes) he needs her to give him ample respect. Has he actually bitten her?
> I think he needs to know you are top dog, not him and you will manage the puppy.
> ...


Sorry, yes I agree with Marzi - I said make sure he knows he is top dog but just to clarify, I meant between him and the puppy. Obviously you must be top pack leader and as Marzi said you are the puppy's manager not him.


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## Florida Cockapoo (Aug 24, 2012)

You didn't say how old the chihuahua is. Chihuahua's I think can be hard to change sometimes. I know Piper's experience with a "family" chihuahua didn't go so well. He is an 9 year male chihuahua that my husband's son owns. Jackson chased Piper though out the house and corner her under our birds cage and freak Piper to the point of her shacking and going off like a firer alarm.  And I don't think Jackson is going to change anytime soon. I don't know how well the "next meeting" will go, but I don't hope for anything different.

That being said if your chihuahua is a much older dog, then it may be hard to change him. Like people have said I would give it a few more weeks, but making sure both dogs have their own space. But your cockapoo is still a puppy and may be to much for your chihuahua to adjust to. She will be "puppy" for quite some time.

That is a frustrating thing, maybe a trainer can come to house and help with the adjustment for your chihuahua.


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## sugerlump (Oct 6, 2012)

chihuhuas are very hard dogs, they like what they like and that is it.they are one of the hardest dogs to train and can be very stubern.my oldest son had one and was pritty good but snippy.well a friend of his came to visit with there new puppy,and chychy would not even let the poor puppy out of a corner it was so bad we had to hold the puppy all day cause soon as he got put down he would get jumped on.and so it went.that is till the next visit ,it so seemed that the little puppy was a German shepherd. and in the time it took to come back for another visit was about 9 months. well i will stop this story now so not to alarm you all .but after that visit they now get along just fine ,but the first hour was hell haa Haa


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## beana (Jan 8, 2013)

Hi Tracey,

I'm sorry to hear your having problems. Everyone has given really good advice so far and hopefully it will work out given time.

I just wondered where abouts you are?

We have been thinking about getting a sister for Cooper, so if you do decide you do want to re home dolly please let me know.

Many Thanks and good luck

Vicky


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## traceyb (Nov 5, 2013)

Thank you all for your advice 
My Chihuahua is 4 and he was fine with our other older dog but this is just hell! It is upsetting the puppy, upsetting me and upsetting my 2 kids to see it. It is just so waring trying to protect Dolly and also make a fuss of Hugo and when i go out shopping etc I am worried to death that something terrible will happen. Although i cage Dolly and put her in another room when i am out i can hear Hugo crying and scratching at the door ... it's a nightmare!
I really do think that before it goes any further and Dolly becomes even more attached to us and us to her we have got to let her go. My kids are upset about it now, never mind in a month or so's time 
We live in Derbyshire
Tracey x


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## beana (Jan 8, 2013)

It does sound like it is really upsetting you.

i've sent you a private message.

Vicky


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## Jensen (Apr 23, 2013)

Perhaps you could try get a dog behaviour specialist in to see if they have ideas on how to deal with things, sometimes it is the smallest changes that can make the bigger ones happen?

Must be so hard for you


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## Cat 53 (Aug 26, 2012)

How sad for you all. Good luck.


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## DB1 (Jan 20, 2012)

hard for you and sounds like a tricky situation, have you contacted the breeder? a good breeder would always want to know if a new owner is having any problems. Good luck with whatever you decide (a trainer/behaviourist could be a good way to go but I know they are not cheap).


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## Tinman (Apr 23, 2013)

DB1 said:


> hard for you and sounds like a tricky situation, have you contacted the breeder? a good breeder would always want to know if a new owner is having any problems. Good luck with whatever you decide (a trainer/behaviourist could be a good way to go but I know they are not cheap).


Good point dawn, if lovely little pup is only 9 weeks, the breeder may have others on the list that are wanting pups, although I think someone on here is considering rehoming her. X


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## tessybear (May 1, 2011)

Tracey I am with you over this. I have a friend with a male chihuahua and they bought a girl boxer puppy. They loathe each other still after 2 years but have had the boxer too long and can't bear to rehome it. They can never leave them alone together or even walk them together. 
I think you are doing the right thing for your puppy and your sanity.


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## kendal (Jul 16, 2009)

Things will settle down, the older dog often has their nose out of joint when a new puppy comes in the house. 

However you need to start taking controle of the your older dog, he has lost the dog that normally kept him in check so it's know your job to disaplin him. 

If he reacted like this if you had a new baby would you re home the baby? 

This is a new pack member he need to learn to live with her.


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

I'm torn on this one. In balance I'd say a possible fifteen year sentence of living with hostile feuding dogs vs a quick rehome of a lovable, cute, trainable pup who could still find a forever home....? I think I'd choose the later and let the chiuaua be an only dog.  Good luck.


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## Florida Cockapoo (Aug 24, 2012)

The problem I am seeing is that cockapoos are very sensitive dogs. Leaving them in a home with a Chihuahua that is "harassing" the Cockapoo could cause emotional problems for him. Then that will just add more problems for you. 

Re-homing your Cockapoo may be the best solution if you can't socialize the two. Especially at this early age in the puppy's life. It would be best to do it now instead of waiting two years and then giving the cockapoo away to someone with emotional problems. Then they will have to deal with a screwed up dog.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


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## traceyb (Nov 5, 2013)

Thank you all  .... sadly we are going to rehome Dolly because she is just absolutely adorable and while she is still so young and with such a fab temperament she will easily adjust to a new loving forever home, i don't feel she deserves to be so harassed after just leaving her mummy  and as for rehoming a new baby KENDAL ... that is rather a ridiculous comparison because at 52 i won't be having a new baby!!!!! and if he did react like that around ANY child my chihuahua would be the one swiftly exiting our home without a second thought!!!!!


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

You are very brave and deserve a hug.  I bet that was not an easy decision and I think you acted in the best interest of both your dogs and not your own needs, which is what all dog owners should do. I'm sorry that it worked out like this but now you can lavish your chiuaua with all your love.


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## RuthMill (Jun 30, 2012)

What an awful hard decision to have made. I think it's sad that you aren't able to experience having a Cockapoo in your life especially after making the commitment to welcome Dolly in to your home. I can understand fully that you've done this for her and I am sure she will thrive with another family. Hopefully they are close by and you can keep in contact. Maybe Dolly's new family will join the forum.


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## Caira (May 27, 2013)

how very sad, I can't imagine how difficult that must be, we love our Summer so much and I can't imagine how terrible I'd feel If we had to rehome her. 
I had one day, few weeks ago when I wasn't sure if we made the right decision to get puppy with two small kids - the kids were super extra naughty that day and wouldn't leave her alone for a minute, and poor Summer was just hiding all evening in her crate or she'd be by my side all the time and that made me wonder for a minute if she'd be better off in a household with an older kids or at least better behaved kids 
The fact that you decided to rehome your puppy shows that you love and care for her, and you only want her to have the best possible home. I hope we will never be in this situation as Summer is my baby and love her dearly, but If I felt that rehoming her was the only option to keep her happy and healthy than I would do it, not for myself, but for her. Big hugs xxx


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## DB1 (Jan 20, 2012)

Hard decision for you, don't beat yourself up about it, Dolly will settle quickly and get over it a lot quicker than you. xx


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## beana (Jan 8, 2013)

I'm sure Tracey won't mind me saying - but my family and i are going to give Dolly a new forever home. We will go and pick her up on saturday.

We are very excited.

Any advice people can give me on bringing dolly into the home with Cooper who is 12 months will be greatly appreciated.

vicky 
xx


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## RachelJ (Oct 5, 2012)

Aw Tracey big hugs to you, that is an awful decision to have to make. The bond we have with these little poos are just so strong and like you say although its a hard decision to make its best to do it sooner rather than later and will be much easier for Dolly to adjust to a new home. You have made the right decision for you and Dolly x

So pleased to hear you are going to take Dolly Vicky that is amazing news - so exciting for you and Cooper  wishing you lots of luck and happiness! Please let us know how Dolly is and how she is settling! Sure you will give her all the love and attention she needs and Tracey will be pleased she is going to a great new home x


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

The only advice I have heard is to never get two very dominant dogs in the same home and that as soon as THEY determine the pecking order you all must respect it too. That means with greeting, feeding, first through doors, best treats, best spot on the sofa...all go first to the dominant dog. Respecting that will mean far fewer squabbles. 

How exciting that this turned out to be a win win win win situation, especially as the pup in question is still so young.  Good luck!


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## Tinman (Apr 23, 2013)

Oh I'm sure cooper will love dolly! 
I'm so pleased to read a happy ending to this story xxx


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## dio.ren (Jan 18, 2013)

Tinman said:


> Oh I'm sure cooper will love dolly!
> I'm so pleased to read a happy ending to this story xxx


So am I! Vicky that is so great for you and little Cooper will have a sweet little friend Cooper is still puppyish if he is anything like Molly. She loves puppy's she can play all day with them. One of her little friends is younger than her and they play so well together he is a yorkie but they play the same way. If she is with an older dog she plays differently. Guess she adjusts to whatever dog she plays with


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## Lottierachel (Mar 3, 2013)

Lovely that we will be able to hear all about her  are you going to keep her name the same? I think Dolly is a lovely name  pictures soon please!! X


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## RuthMill (Jun 30, 2012)

Delighted Dolly will be joining Cooper! What a lucky puppy. Great news Vicky!


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## beana (Jan 8, 2013)

Thanks everyone, i'm over the moon 

We have been thinking about getting Cooper a friend for a while and I just couldn't resist dolly's little face.

A little bit of a rush and the husband only having a week to get use to the idea, is still in shock lol.

We have a 5 hour drive ahead of us on friday, going to stay in a hotel and pick dolly up on saturday.

I'm very excited but also a little anxious as to what Cooper will be like - I'm just keeping everything crossed.

I will be keeping the name as i think dolly is really sweet and really suits her.

Of course i will post pictures as soon as i can and fill you in with all the details but in the mean time any more advice would be great.

Vicky xx


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## Tinman (Apr 23, 2013)

Cooper will love her, they will become the best of friends x


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## Florida Cockapoo (Aug 24, 2012)

Glad everything work out for EVERYONE Poo and human involved.


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

Florida Cockapoo said:


> Glad everything work out for EVERYONE Poo and human involved.


Not to mention chiuaua!


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## Tinman (Apr 23, 2013)

fairlie said:


> Not to mention chiuaua!


Ha trust you - the little chihuahua is the only one made up to see the back of poor dolly and be top dog again!


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## traceyb (Nov 5, 2013)

Thanks everyone, it is so lovely to receive so much support and so many good wishes for our little Dolly. I am trying to keep my feelings for her very deep inside because in the short time we have had her i just adore her. I am sure Vicky will find it easy with the transition because although she likes to play, she is so sweet natured, easy going and gentle and won't be trying to dominate. That is why the tiny, mighty Hugo was feeling like Rambo! He is now temporarily with my parents!! Please don't think badly of Hugo or think he is a nasty little chihuahua because he is adorable to live with and i miss him being here but i think he just took advantage of Dolly's gentle nature.Like i said before, he was absolutely fine with our previous dog but she was boss and he obviously had a lion in that little body waiting to make an appearance LOL!
Although this is hard, i know it is the right thing to do and is made so much easier by knowing that she is going to a lovely home  ... I look forward to seeing all the updates on here, i will follow with interest and love xx


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## Tinman (Apr 23, 2013)

Ah tracey no one thinks bad of you - or big little Hugo. 
Unfortunately it just didn't work out for you, but you have found the perfect solution to resolve the problem. 
So everyone is happy! Although I'm sure your very sad too xx


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## dmgalley (Aug 19, 2012)

traceyb said:


> Thanks everyone, it is so lovely to receive so much support and so many good wishes for our little Dolly. I am trying to keep my feelings for her very deep inside because in the short time we have had her i just adore her. I am sure Vicky will find it easy with the transition because although she likes to play, she is so sweet natured, easy going and gentle and won't be trying to dominate. That is why the tiny, mighty Hugo was feeling like Rambo! He is now temporarily with my parents!! Please don't think badly of Hugo or think he is a nasty little chihuahua because he is adorable to live with and i miss him being here but i think he just took advantage of Dolly's gentle nature.Like i said before, he was absolutely fine with our previous dog but she was boss and he obviously had a lion in that little body waiting to make an appearance LOL!
> Although this is hard, i know it is the right thing to do and is made so much easier by knowing that she is going to a lovely home  ... I look forward to seeing all the updates on here, i will follow with interest and love xx


You have done the right thing by both of your dogs. Jake does the same thing to me. He us fine with some dogs and goes after others. It has me nervous about getting another some day. Please don't ever feel bad about doing the right thing. 

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## Marzi (Sep 17, 2012)

:hug:
I do feel for you - it is not a situation that you anticipated or chose. 
So sorry that things did not work out for you, but I'm sure that Dolly will settle in quickly and be happy in her new home with Cooper.


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## RuthMill (Jun 30, 2012)

Glad it's worked out for everyone. No one thinks bad of Hugo either I'm sure. Looking forward to hearing Dolly stories.


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

Hugo can be an honourary cockapoo if you like, there is a border collie here too.  Hugo sounds alot like Rufus, very extreme in his opinions.


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## Cat 53 (Aug 26, 2012)

Hope this will raise a smile. My son was about 7 years old and he came in and said 'Mum, what is a Chi.....who.....a.....who.....a?' Me......'what? Let me see.......oh you mean chee....wow.....wa! It's a little dog'.


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## JoJo (Mar 2, 2011)

Caira said:


> how very sad, I can't imagine how difficult that must be, we love our Summer so much and I can't imagine how terrible I'd feel If we had to rehome her.
> I had one day, few weeks ago when I wasn't sure if we made the right decision to get puppy with two small kids - the kids were super extra naughty that day and wouldn't leave her alone for a minute, and poor Summer was just hiding all evening in her crate or she'd be by my side all the time and that made me wonder for a minute if she'd be better off in a household with an older kids or at least better behaved kids
> The fact that you decided to rehome your puppy shows that you love and care for her, and you only want her to have the best possible home. I hope we will never be in this situation as Summer is my baby and love her dearly, but If I felt that rehoming her was the only option to keep her happy and healthy than I would do it, not for myself, but for her. Big hugs xxx


Petra you would contact me and I would help all the way, and help you with rehoming her, as she would come to me 

The fact is dogs and puppies do need to be rehomed at times, and actually it is a hard decision for any caring person to make, in most cases the dogs don't suffer just the owners ... but I would say always do the best for the dog and try to make it work if you can, but rehoming is not such a bad thing if done well, I don't mean a dog in a rescue place. contact me if you do need any support Tracey, but sounds like a happy ending


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## Caira (May 27, 2013)

JoJo my hubby is joking that if I had to choose between the kids and Summer, he worries where would the kids go


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## Marzi (Sep 17, 2012)

Caira said:


> JoJo my hubby is joking that if I had to choose between the kids and Summer, he worries where would the kids go


26 years ago my OH had a crisis that I was only marrying him so that I could get a dog...
I said, not one dog - 2 (or three)


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