# Any Advice Welcome



## DebsLynn (Jun 18, 2018)

Good morning, this is my first post on here, I joined prior to finding our cockapoo puppy to gain some insight on the breed.

Here goes. Monty joined us 3 weeks ago tomorrow, he was 14 weeks old yesterday, so was 11.5 weeks when he moved in. I will put as much information below so you can see our set up.

He is amazing, his house training is going better than we expected (not one accident in his crate, 4 accidents, my fault most probably, and sits at the door to go out so needs watching obviously), learned sit, lay down and wait (for his food although he is a bit of a gluten), so all in all just an cracking little chap.

Was in a crate when when we went to meet him, and has been crated every night in the kitchen (where we live 85% of the time), and his crate is opposite the sofa. We give him a walk early evening and then sit in the lounge from about 9 until 10.45 (he has a bed next to the sofa, he goes in it straight away and lays down and sleeps), we bring him into the kitchen, toilet then crate, with the command of bedtime.

So here goes: 
He doesn't want to go in the crate, although when I take him to it, he walks in and lays down, and over the last 3 weeks has stopped his crying and his new learned barking, and sleeps through until anywhere between 5 -6 am (it was 6 and now getting earlier). I get him up after a few barks, and take him out in the garden where he goes for a pee straightaway. He is now getting earlier so I have started putting him back in his crate and I lie on the sofa until either 5.30 or 6, he whimpers but eventually nods off again, I feed him just before 7 and he puts himself in his crate and goes to sleep again (usually after a little walk or a visit in the garden). 

Some nights he just cries, whimpers and barks for about 30 minutes. In the day, completely different dog, if I leave the room he whimpers, then cries and starts barking, and has now started to do this while eating his breakfast (I feed him in the utility which has a toilet off of it) if I go to the toilet he carries on eating but whimpers and cries while eating as I have gone behind a door.

If I go upstairs he does the same, if he can't see me he does the same, if I put him in his crate to go upstairs to put washing away etc he barks and cries until I come back (at no point do I let him out or acknowledge him while he makes these noises and also he does not scratch or jump around, he either lays down or sits up while making these noises). If my husband is home and leaves the room he whimpers at the door but not for long and vice a versa, he does it with both of us, but if I am in the kitchen he will play in the garden happily, he will sit outside with either of us if the other isn't in view.

I have bought toys that I fill with goodies (very food orientated) but not really bothered by the treats. If I put him in his crate and shut the door but stay in site he cries but after 10 mins will settle.

So what I want to know, is what am I doing wrong? I really don't want to make things worse by just guessing and locking him in his crate so that he is then frightened of it as he loves going in there to sleep with the door open,

Apologies for such a long post, but I wanted to go all the information I could. Would love some advice.

For Info, as he was nearly 12 weeks when he went to the vets for his vaccinations, she said after his 1st one he could go out after a week as long as he doesn't mix with dogs who are not inoculated and he can't go to farms, stables or waterways (basically anywhere there could be a risk of coming into contact with rats). Although he loves dogs as my friend has a fully vaccinated cockapoo and loves him, next injection is 13th and he will be able to go anywhere on the 20th.

Thank you for reading this, I am being realistic here and would not want to cause him anything that could make him worse he is just such a fantastic pup and already an important member of our family, so please be honest.


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## Willow2018 (Jun 16, 2018)

It seems to me you are doing nothing wrong. Our baby is 18 weeks old today. When I go to the downstairs toilet for example Willow used to sit there and whimper or bark, but now she has got used to it and just sits there and waits for me, sometimes she'll still whimper too. 

We also went through the same night time experience around the same age as yours where she was going until around 4.30-5 then started to get a bit earlier and I found myself doing what you are which is coming down after once the noise becomes more intense let her out (she peed and/or pooped) then lay on the sofa while she lay on the floor or back in her crate. I found that this just encouraged her to want to play as she could see I was here so I changed the habit and once she'd been out I led her back into her crate with as little talking and fuss and covered the crate again and went back to bed. She now stays in (most nights) until around 7am. We are aiming for 7.15-7.30 but will see what happens. 

Sounds like you are doing a fab job but of course I'm certainly no expert so someone else may be able to offer some different advice but think of it like this.... if you've ever had children they are so alike, e.g...

Growth spurts = unsettled so eat more sleep more etc...
Teething = unsettled so may be off food if dry food as hurts to chew and a bit sleepy too
Out of sight = unsettled so may feel a little anxious (but this doesn't mean he has separation anxiety)

He is still young so it will come... eventually something will click and you'll all be more relaxed.

Finally....remember Cockapoos are most definitely people dogs so love being around people. Good luck x


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## DebsLynn (Jun 18, 2018)

Thank you so much. Reference to children, I would definitely say harder, that or my 2 were easy  Much more so now they are adults and have left home! 

He is such a darling puppy, that I would really not forgive myself if I did something that would make him worse. The night time I can deal with, he was going to the crate with no noise, so last night was out of character, however, he is teething and loves to be with people (true to their breed).

It is the daytime I have the issues, though I don't work I obviously need to shower and do housework, or even the dreaded supermarket shuffle.

This morning I put him in his crate with toys and a treat and left the house for 40 minutes, he obviously made a noise as I left and on entering the house, but was quiet when I walked in the kitchen, so I pottered for a few minutes before acknowledging him and letting him out. But he was in no way stressed or anything, maybe the issue is me and I need to leave him more (30 minutes in the morning and 30 in the afternoon to get used to it maybe?).

Thank you for your reply and your kind words, and I am glad that I am not on this journey with him on my own xx


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## Willow2018 (Jun 16, 2018)

You're definitely not on your own and everything you are doing sounds exactly what I would do and yes maybe try leaving him more, I did make a point of this also even if I just went across the road to mother in law's or a neighbour for half an hour because like you I am home all day and became conscious that I wasn't leaving her enough so I had to start making a point of popping out to get some milk or do the banking etc... as I was told to leave Willow little and often and gradually build it up. We are now comfortable leaving her for 3 hours if we go out as a family and gradually building on it. 

Stay with it... it will get better. I'm just taking one day at a time.


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## DebsLynn (Jun 18, 2018)

Thanks Willow, really appreciate you taking time out to answer. I know you are right about leaving him (hard when they are your babies isn't it), but will take on board the fact that to help him I need to leave him, he did well today when I did, so tomorrow I will double m effort and schedule time out for myself, so thank you xx


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## Willow2018 (Jun 16, 2018)

That's brilliant so glad you did it! Yes it is very hard as we do love our babies but you're doing a great job! Keep in touch x


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## DebsLynn (Jun 18, 2018)

Thank you. Some nights he goes to sleep straightaway, others he cries and barks for 30 mins, so not sure where I am going wrong there, but consistency is the name of the game I think.

I can now go upstairs and tell Monty to stay at the bottom, I can then potter or shower and dry my hair with minimal noise and he will stay there until I come back down, so that is a bonus, and I can put a kong in his crate and he will go in, I can shut it and walk out with no noise, but on my return yesterday he was making such a terrible noise. If I leave him in the kitchen and nip to water my neighbours plants, he again starts barking and crying as he can't see me. 

So overall, he is getting so much better and I know he doesn't have separation anxiety, which is a relief. But I also have to remind myself that he is still only 15 weeks old.


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## Willow2018 (Jun 16, 2018)

Well done, that is so much better than before and you'll find that all of a sudden you'll realise that he doesn't do it anymore and bit by bit it will get better. Keep on and be interesting to see how Monty is doing in a couple of weeks from now x


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