# Insanity



## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Axle is driving me insane! LOL His seperation anxiety is off the wall. I can't do anything without him crying and I don't mean a little crying, I mean CRYING that is so loud I have had complaints with neighbors. The second he sees I am about to leave he will start to "puppy scream" that gets my blood boiling. No matter what I do he will not stop. And he is jumping ALL the time on me and then scratching me when he comes down if that makes sense. He barks and growls at me for no reason that my husband is getting quite frustrated with him. His pulling when we walk had gotten worse despite all the hard work we have done for months. Today he ate part of the wall, yes the wall. I am at my wits end. OH! And he refuses to eat. Ok, well he will eat when he wants ONLY to the point where he throws up everyday from being so hungry. I dont know what to do anymore. I love him so much but now since we have a baby on the way I am getting to the point where I am crabby when I have to deal with him and I need to focus on other things now and this is driving me insane. Also, when we eat dinner he begs BAD, very bad. And, if we try and pick him up or walk towards him he RUNS under the couch and my husband and myself have to lay on the floor of each side of the couch and try and get him out. When I get up at night to pee (cuz im pregnant, lol) he barks and whines and I have trouble sometimes going back to sleep. I dread the day he barks and wakes the baby up after I just got him / her back down. Im so done but I love him so much.


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## weez74 (Feb 9, 2011)

I know others will help with the behavioural responses, but do you think Axle senses that you're pregnant? He might be going through a rough patch coming to terms with you smelling different and acting different?

How old is Axle? Could it be his teenage years? I think that kicks in about 8 months?


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## Dylansmum (Oct 29, 2010)

Jesarie said:


> Axle is driving me insane! LOL His seperation anxiety is off the wall. I can't do anything without him crying and I don't mean a little crying, I mean CRYING that is so loud I have had complaints with neighbors. The second he sees I am about to leave he will start to "puppy scream" that gets my blood boiling. No matter what I do he will not stop. And he is jumping ALL the time on me and then scratching me when he comes down if that makes sense. He barks and growls at me for no reason that my husband is getting quite frustrated with him. His pulling when we walk had gotten worse despite all the hard work we have done for months. Today he ate part of the wall, yes the wall. I am at my wits end. OH! And he refuses to eat. Ok, well he will eat when he wants ONLY to the point where he throws up everyday from being so hungry. I dont know what to do anymore. I love him so much but now since we have a baby on the way I am getting to the point where I am crabby when I have to deal with him and I need to focus on other things now and this is driving me insane. Also, when we eat dinner he begs BAD, very bad. And, if we try and pick him up or walk towards him he RUNS under the couch and my husband and myself have to lay on the floor of each side of the couch and try and get him out. When I get up at night to pee (cuz im pregnant, lol) he barks and whines and I have trouble sometimes going back to sleep. I dread the day he barks and wakes the baby up after I just got him / her back down. Im so done but I love him so much.


Hi Jess, So sorry to hear what a hard time you're having with him - last thing you need when you are pregnant. The last time you were having big problems with Axle was when you went back to work - have you suddenly changed your home routine or can you put your finger on what's upsetting him? If not, then maybe since you've been at home full-time you've just given him too much time and attention and not set the boundaries firmly enough?? I'm only making suggestions for you to consider, because I've no way of knowing, but sounds like he's really testing you. This is what I would try in your place, but there are others on here much more expert at behaviour than me:
Could you try going back to some basic training to reinforce the "come, sit, stay, leave" commands. If you never feed him from the table then he shouldn't be begging - if you have done, then stop. Why would he beg if he never got any result from it? Try to establish a clear routine, where time playing or training with him is followed by time when he is ignored and expected to amuse himself. I think that if dogs have a routine, they get used to it and accept it. So maybe food, amuse himself while you clear up, walk, amuse himself, training, amuse himself, walk, amuse himself. 
When I need to go out, I give Dylan a bone. He is so busy with the bone that he barely notices I've gone and he doesn't even follow me to the door.
As regards the not eating, are you sure there's nothing wrong with his stomach for him to be sick and not eat? Never heard of hunger causing vomiting. Maybe he's off his food and you could think about changing to a different type.
Hope the situation improves. :hug:


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## weez74 (Feb 9, 2011)

I found this, which might make you feel like you're not alone, even if it doesn't actually help!

http://www.pregnancy.org/bulletinboards/showthread.php?t=614496


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## caradunne (Nov 29, 2010)

Hi Jess
I concur with Helen and think you need to revisit some basics. I read through some of your posts today - have you tried moving his crate out of your bedroom? You really need to get that established before your baby arrives at the end of the year. I know this is so hard and I really feel for you, having had two difficult pregnancies myself (many years ago). You are at an early stage in your pregnancy and your hormones are going crazy - this makes everything seem so much worse. It will pass, you will even out and feel more able to cope. Not that this helps now! Does your husband know how desperate you feel? Can he take over with more of the puppy training for you for now? I want to give you a big hug xx


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## Georgiapeach (Feb 12, 2011)

Dylansmum said:


> As regards the not eating, are you sure there's nothing wrong with his stomach for him to be sick and not eat? Never heard of hunger causing vomiting. Maybe he's off his food and you could think about changing to a different type.
> Hope the situation improves. :hug:


Sorry about Axel's behavior recently. I too, would be sent over the edge with that, and I'm definitely not pregnant! 

Regarding the vomiting, dogs can definitely throw up if their stomachs get too empty. In the boxer world, we call it "the hunger pukes" (all that comes up usually is some yellowish looking foamy stuff - blech!), and boxers get it easily, which is why most boxers are fed at least 2x daily; some even get a small snack at bedtime b/c they can't make it through the night. I guess it's b/c they have such high metabolisms?? I don't have a boxer anymore, but I still feed my current dogs twice a day (daily ration divided into two equal parts), and they're much happier that way. I agree - maybe either change foods, or mix in a tablespoon of no fat plain yogurt, or some low sodium chicken broth (just enough to dampen food) to encourage better eating.

The begging at the table must stop. Our dogs are not allowed anywhere near the table while we're eating. They have to stay in the living room, well away from the table. If they don't mind, they're crated during dinner. It didn't take them long to learn!


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## JulesB (Mar 6, 2011)

Betty sometimes does the yellow foamy sick, usually first thing in the morning, so interesting to know that about Boxers as I hadn't heard that but defo makes me feel better as I know she wasn't ill but it did concern me at times, but she was a fussy eater so it does make sense!

Jess - I echo what people have said already. As for food, Betty was hugely fussy and I tried a few different kibbles, she would eat them the first meal and then nothing for the next day. It got to the stage where she would only eat 2 meals out of 6. In the end I resorted to giving her a good quality wet food (it's a UK food called Nature Diet) which she loves and she now wolfs this down and I have even found her waiting by where her food bowl goes for food in the morning now which was unheard of before.

Betty wasn't great at being left when I first got her and I really did stress myself out over. Now she has a routine where whenever I am going out and leaving her she goes and lies on her blanket and waits for her treat that I give her when I go out. My neighbour says she hears the odd bark from her (but she does that when I am home anyway if she hears things outside) but defo seems more settled.

I wonder if the fact you are a little bit stressed by Axle's behaviour may be as he is picking up on hormonal changes in you and your stress which may be making him worse. I only wonder this as my best friend was looking to have to move overseas and his dog started weeing in the house etc and misbehaving almost as if she was picking up on my friends stress.

I really hope you get it sorted and congratulations on your impending baby!


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Heres the thing. I do not and NEVER feed him from the table I know that is a HUGE NO NO so where this behavior is coming from is beyond me. And no matter what you do he will NOT stop. So now we have resorted to putting him in his crate sometimes just so my husband and I can sit and eat. I am fully aware that crates should NEVER be used for a "punishment" but I have no choice. I live on the 3rd floor apartment not like I can put him outside and when he is in the crate he will stare at me and cry.

Axle will sit and wait when I say but that's it! He will not come, he will not walk right NOTHING! And it's not like im a newbie god owner, I have had dogs literally my whole entire life.

When I leave bones in his crate do NOT work. He will cry and cry and cry and when I come home they are still there. He will NOT touch them.

He is almost a year old.

I do not work and have not worked in over 6 months. I am a full time house wife and since my husband is a disabled combat vet he is home too so it's not like Axle is always neglected. He is played with, gets walks everyday 4x a day and I hate it. Not like the walks are pleasant. NOTHING has changed in his life he will just not change and I am sooo over it.

We talked last night about possibly giving him to a new home because I cannot do this. Axle trips me when we walk up the stairs and Dave (husband) said that if he EVER sees that (since I am pregnant) he is not sure that he would not be able to pop him. But with all this being said we talked for hours last night in bed and decided that we cannot give him away. It's too emotional.

This behavior even started before I was pregnant. Axle literally thinks he is the king of the castle. I am just not going to be nice to him AT ALL until he calms down. I know this sounds mean but I am at my witts end. And last night was a final straw when he ate the wall.

Also, I will take him for a walk, he will pee but he will ONLY poop if we stand there and coax him in circles for like 5 minutes. Literally. I am NOT going to put up with this anymore. I am so OVER it. So, he won't poop sometimes then we walk up 3 flights of stairs get in the house, take off my shoes and jacket and he WHINES because he has to go. Then we have to take him out...again.

We plan on moving in April because the Army is sending Dave to school. And I already told Dave that when we get a house and we have a yard Axle will only come in the house to sleep BUT at the same time I dont want him to have free range of the yard because I don't want poop and holes everywhere.

I am stuck between a rock and a hard stone.


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## Kel (Feb 1, 2011)

I don't have much experience with dogs and my dog is no angel  so I won't offer up much advice. Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are so stressed. I would be too, in your position.

Have you had or considered a private session with a dog trainer? Things can't continue on as they are and maybe a professional could help evaluate the situation.

I know it would be difficult emotionally (and I do believe animals are a lifetime commitment) BUT rehoming him might be best for all of you. It doesn't make you a horrible person, though it is a horrible decision to have to make. Far better than losing your temper with him and him getting hurt in the heat of the moment (not saying that would actually happen, but...)

Your human baby has to come first now 

Whatever your decision, I wish you well...and Congrats on the baby


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Thank you so much. I have put so much thought into rehoming him. I have had him since he was 6 weeks old so it's just not something I can cope with. My husband and I almost came to tears last night discussing all the pros and the cons with Axle. Bottom line, I love Axle so much and the thought of someone else having him breaks my heart. ugh. Maybe my hormones are just crazy right now! I dont know.

Thank you for the congratz Kelly. Much appreciated!

And, HUGS TO YOU ALL for helping me with some great advice in this time of need.


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Tonight my husband decided to take a walk with me without the dog. We wanted some alone time and to just enjoy the night. We did not even walk for 5 minutes because you could hear Axle clear on the other side of the complex. We then came inside becase we could not handle it and he pooped. I was brought to tears. I cant do this anymore. We might rehome him to better him as well as this new family that is going to start soon.


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## tessybear (May 1, 2011)

Jess I am going to come straight in with my opinion here! 
I have been in your situation before but with a cat. I was pregnant, with an unmanagable but much loved young cat and decided (it was very painful) to rehome it. You are an experienced dog owner and it sounds like you have tried everything. In my opinion you should call it a day- at this stage in your life you should be calm and relaxed and enjoying being pregnant, preparing for your baby. I think rehoming it would be the right decision for you as a family and the best for your baby- it certainly was for me. Good luck!


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

tessybear said:


> Jess I am going to come straight in with my opinion here!
> I have been in your situation before but with a cat. I was pregnant, with an unmanagable but much loved young cat and decided (it was very painful) to rehome it. You are an experienced dog owner and it sounds like you have tried everything. In my opinion you should call it a day- at this stage in your life you should be calm and relaxed and enjoying being pregnant, preparing for your baby. I think rehoming it would be the right decision for you as a family and the best for your baby- it certainly was for me. Good luck!


I cannot agree more with you. This is a VERY painful decision that I have come to but just right now my husband and I were watching tv and Axle pooped right in the middle of the living room. He stopped telling us when he has to go out, he just goes when he wants. I cant do this anymore. I need to prepare and get my house ready for a newborn which includes clean floors for when I cuddle with him / her laying on the floor or what have you. I have been to tears many times today but in the end I know this will be better for myself, the baby and Axle. You are totally right. I have been putting up with this for months and the last thing I need is high blood pressure. We are taking him to the "doggie orphanage" tomorrow morning where I know he will be treated with care and he will find a GREAT home. The adoption agency that I am taking him to tomorrow is wonderful. They treat there animals with royality. I have been there so many times and I am confident that Axle will find a new home and fast.

I really appreciate your thoughts and I will keep you updated.


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## Dylansmum (Oct 29, 2010)

Jess, we all feel for you and send you our love. I had to rehome my last dog, who was a rescued samoyed. I spent 9 agonising months trying everything I could to train her and cope with her and I loved her dearly. In the end I reluctantly gave her to samoyed rescue who had a new home for her. It broke my heart, but was also a tremendous relief, and my life was so much better without her. And now I have Dylan who is everything I wanted in a dog and fits my life properly.
So just get through this hard decision by having faith that it is for the best for your family and for Axle. A good rescue organisation will find the right home for him and you'll all be happier. :hug:


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

I keep telling myself that this is better for everyone which is making me feel a little better. I feel guilty like I have failed, but I am the same as you Helen. I have had Axle for 11 months, a little longer then 9 but still. I have done everything in my power to make this work and it's just not. I know for a fact that when this baby is born and I do not have the stress of taking care of a newborn and a dog I will feel better. I know this is for the better. I just need to stay strong. I got all his stuff packed by the door, we are taking him first thing in the morning.


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## embee (Dec 27, 2010)

This sounds like the best decision for both of you. I read your earlier posts and it seems things have got so on top of you that I couldn't think how to begin to advise you.

Having your first baby is so special and you need to be able to relax, enjoy being pregnant and enjoy your baby as you will never get the time back. Please don't feel bad for Axle as they don't think the same way we do. As long as he is well cared for and his needs are met he'll be just fine.


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

embee said:


> This sounds like the best decision for both of you. I read your earlier posts and it seems things have got so on top of you that I couldn't think how to begin to advise you.
> 
> Having your first baby is so special and you need to be able to relax, enjoy being pregnant and enjoy your baby as you will never get the time back. Please don't feel bad for Axle as they don't think the same way we do. As long as he is well cared for and his needs are met he'll be just fine.


Thank you so much. I cant tell you how much your response meant to me. I never thought of it like as long as he is getting cared for he will be fine. Thank you so so so much. I really needed to hear that. As you can tell, its after 1am and I cant sleep. I have been drinking decaf coffee and I just feel terrible.


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## wilfiboy (Sep 18, 2010)

Hi Jess only just seen this thread, you have nt failed my love, we all know how much you love Axle and its because you love him so much that you have worked and worked and then come to this difficult and we all know painful decision . But you've had the strength to know when you have to let go for the sake of your relationship and your new baby and a new start for Axle is probably best for him now. Because you love him you have to do what is right for him. Sending you loads of love its going to be hard but you need to spend time with Dave, keeping healthy and growing your beauitful baby ... look forward to hearing your special news later in the year... stay positive, all the best to you all :hug::hug:


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## Tressa (Aug 31, 2010)

Good luck to you, Jess. You must keep yourself well for your baby. You are making sure Axle will fare well in his future. What a hard decision, but seems it is the right one for you, and after the sadness of parting with him you must also feel overwhelming relief that you can concentrate on yourself and your pregnancy. It is difficult enough without extra stress and you have done your best. We are only human


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## JulesB (Mar 6, 2011)

Good luck Jess and I know it will be a difficult day for you tomorrow but you have to put you and your baby first. 

x


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## embee (Dec 27, 2010)

Jesarie said:


> As you can tell, its after 1am and I cant sleep. I have been drinking decaf coffee and I just feel terrible.


Aww sweetie it'll all be just fine. Axle will be happy and you really do need to see the time you had with him as one chapter, turn the page and think about all the good times to come. The forum is for prospective owners, owners and past owners so stick around and let us know all about the good stuff to come.


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Hi everyone. I just got home and honestly I feel good. I feel like I did a good thing for my family and for Axle. I know in the end this was a very well discussed and a very good decision. It may hit me tonight but I cried yesterday and today is a new day and I am trying to stay positive. I appreciate all your support.


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## kendal (Jul 16, 2009)

i dont want to be the big meenie hear. i mean my mum rehomed a dog and it was the best thing she could have done for her as she became an asistance dog for a friends mum. 

i know you have had problems with him. but dog are sensative, he will have notest a change, your pregnancy will be giving off loads of different hormon sents that may be confusing him. 

can i just ask how long have you been decussing rehoming him. are you 100% that this is the best thing to do. 

i compleatly suported one of the girls on her whos mum decided to rehome their dog because it had been talked about for months and she realy was tring she just didnt have the suport of her family. 


i just dont want this desision to be a rash one. i understand you are thinking of your baby, but having a dog in the house is so good for a baby. 

have you tried a spray collar for the whining, just as a correction for when you are not in. Delta is better since using one. 

please just think things through before rushing him into the shelter.


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

This has been a discussion on and off since November, so a long time. We have tried everything in our power to make this work. I have done all the tactics I know which have worked so well in the past. We take him to the doggie park which on Saturday morning there are obidience classes. Nothing we do works. This was a good decision I believe. Im still not as sad as I thought I would be because in my heart I feel like I did the right thing for all parties. I am very confident that he will find a new home and fast. He is too cute to pass up. 

Last night he pooped on the living room floor while I watching tv and he had been out already. This morning he walked out of crate and pooped on my bedroom floor. It's just too much for me. My husband is going back to school full time and I stay at home. I'm beyond stressed and there comes a time when I need to think about me, and now it's not just me. It's me and the baby in me.

The place I took him to this morning is awesome. I have gotten pets from there before, I know people that have gotten pets there and its just awesome. Its clean, the environment is awesome, its outside. I know in my heart of hearts Axle will get all the attention and care he needs. I still love him very much. I just need to write this chaper off and give myself credit. I struggled with Axle for 7 months. It's not like I gave up over night. Its been a very long battle and I am just tired.


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## wilfiboy (Sep 18, 2010)

Take care and keep us posted ... do you find out when he's re-homed? All the very best for your future and for your family x


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

I can call them to check the status yes. A part of me wants to and a part of me does not. I do not want to experience all the emotions over again. I know he will find a new home. No doubt in my mind. 

And, thank you. I just woke up from a nap, the house is quiet and I feel ok.


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## tessybear (May 1, 2011)

Jess you sound much better already! I'm sure you have done the right thing- have a great life with your new baby and good luck.


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

Ty Tessy.  I feel better. It's so crazy. I thought I would be an emotional wreck but I have been an emotional wreck for so long that I now feel like I can breathe.


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## strof51 (Sep 26, 2009)

Jess you have done the right thing. I love my dog but in your shoes I would have had no hesitation in rehousing my own dog.
Your baby has to come first and will need all your time. You have done the right thing.


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## Kel (Feb 1, 2011)

I agree, you have done the right thing. I am sure you feel like a weight is lifted off you. Axle will find a great home, no worries.

Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!


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## witchie5 (Oct 25, 2010)

Awww bless you i felt so sad reading this.my cockapoo is now 10 months old and has been beyond hard work but i love her soo much but i to came close to finding her a new home . I think you made the bravest choice and i wish you luck with your baby  x


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

witchie5 said:


> Awww bless you i felt so sad reading this.my cockapoo is now 10 months old and has been beyond hard work but i love her soo much but i to came close to finding her a new home . I think you made the bravest choice and i wish you luck with your baby  x


Thank you so very much.


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## caradunne (Nov 29, 2010)

Hi Jess, I have been away for the weekend and was wondering how you were getting on. You have had to make a difficult decision but it is the right one for you and your family. You can relax now and enjoy being pregnant. When your baby arrives it will be tough and you will be tired and I didn't really know how you would have coped with Axle then. Loads of love Cara xx


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

caradunne said:


> Hi Jess, I have been away for the weekend and was wondering how you were getting on. You have had to make a difficult decision but it is the right one for you and your family. You can relax now and enjoy being pregnant. When your baby arrives it will be tough and you will be tired and I didn't really know how you would have coped with Axle then. Loads of love Cara xx


I am doing just fine actually. I got my house all cleaned, I have been going for walks, I am back to my normal self. Things just feel right where they needed to be. Thank you so much for asking. I do not stress anymore about the big move when the baby will be 4 months since it's across country and with a dog, and we are driving. I do not stress about finding a rental that will allow dogs which is a temp home unil we buy our house. I just feel, free. Sometimes I feel selfish when I talk about how good I am doing but it' not like I gave up over night.


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## lady amanda (Nov 26, 2010)

HI Jess, I hope things continue positive for you. Did you ask for updates on Axle or would that be too hard? Good luck with everything....your new little bundle. it's a good thing to be stress free


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## Jesarie (Sep 9, 2010)

I can but I haven't. Does that make me bad?  I know that when I hear he is somewhere else I might break down and cry again. 

Thank you Amanda. Things will be stress free now and I can concentrate on getting this apartment ready for the baby and for the BIG move across the country. I am a believer that things happen for a reason and the timing with Axle and all this happened so perfectly. I have SOOO much coming my way and it's one less thing to worry about. The baby coming. My husband starting school full time. Then moving across the country because he is getting transfered to a diff school via the army. Then we are getting a temp house until we buy which means I have 2 MAJOR moves ahead of me while being a full time house wife and a new mom.


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## Dylansmum (Oct 29, 2010)

Jesarie said:


> I can but I haven't. Does that make me bad?  I know that when I hear he is somewhere else I might break down and cry again.
> 
> Thank you Amanda. Things will be stress free now and I can concentrate on getting this apartment ready for the baby and for the BIG move across the country. I am a believer that things happen for a reason and the timing with Axle and all this happened so perfectly. I have SOOO much coming my way and it's one less thing to worry about. The baby coming. My husband starting school full time. Then moving across the country because he is getting transfered to a diff school via the army. Then we are getting a temp house until we buy which means I have 2 MAJOR moves ahead of me while being a full time house wife and a new mom.


No it doesn't make you bad at all. I think you feel like you need to switch off and just concentrate on the future. If you felt like you wanted reassurance that he had found a good home, then you could always call to ask them, but I think you're pretty sure about that anyway. I hope everything goes smoothly for you x


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## lady amanda (Nov 26, 2010)

Not bad at all. I was just curious, I don't think I would be able to make contact afterwrds. Just nice to know that you could.
That is ALOT of stuff to handle for sure. You will get through it all. and have a bubbly bouncing baby to take care of.


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