# Puppy Cockapoo (Eric) - Very unsettled when left alone



## roohunt27 (Oct 3, 2014)

Hello everyone,

We're new here, so hello and thank you in advance for any help at all that anybody can offer.

3 weeks ago we picked up our awesome little chocolate cockapoo Eric, he's now 13 weeks old and whilst we're having a brilliant time with him he absolutely hates being left alone.

We're crate training him but every night when we put him down he'll howl and bark and yelp once we've left, it is getting better at night as at first he did it all night long, now he'll give up after maybe maybe 30mins, maybe 2 hours... it varies! We appear to be doing all the right things according to all of the advice out there, he gets plenty of exercise, has lots of fun toys, kongs etc... Also if we have to leave him in the day, he is once again very very upset, he barks, he howls, he yelps, sometimes for the duration of us being out, it sounds awful - and whilst all the advice says to not go to him until he stops, this can sometimes take a while and my concern is that rather than getting fed up with it he has no idea he shouldn't be barking and howling so it's of some comfort to him whilst we're not in his sight and it's becoming a very bad habit. 

I'm concerned that as we work from home and obviously love having him around whilst we work that he's not getting the practice at separation that many other pooches will, as he's with us the majority of the time and that this is making the separation all the worse when we do have to go out without him.

Any advice any owners have for calming him down and making separation not such a devastating situation for him would be really greatly appreciated - Most people seem to say puppies get over this sort of thing within a week or two, but it's approaching a month and whilst it may have gotten a little better, any improvements have been pretty minimal.

Cheers in advance,
Andy and Caroline


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## DB1 (Jan 20, 2012)

sorry you are having problems, I'm sure you have read many a post on here suggesting having the crate near you at night if they are not settling. During the day I would leave him when he is tired with a kong with frozen cream cheese or something else tasty - then if he is enjoying it just leave him alone for a minute or two before he begins to cry and bark, then try to gradually increase the time. If that doesn't work i'm not sure what I would do as luckily i've not really had to deal with this, I'm sure there are plenty that have and maybe able to tell you what helped them. When Dudley was that age I was childminding and often left him in the hall behind a babygate so he got used to not having my attention even though I was there.


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## fairlie (Sep 7, 2013)

Welcome! We definitely need a sticky about separation anxiety as it is a huge issue for many of us on here. 

The expert trainers around here, Marzi, 2ndhandgal and others will be along to offer proper advice soon, in the meantime I will say that cockapoos are smarter than other breeds and the usual advice might not apply. One thing that does help though is a second dog or even a cat friend. Have you any other pets?


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## roohunt27 (Oct 3, 2014)

Thanks guys, even if he's distracted by a Kong, as soon as he's fed up with it (Could take 5, 10 or 45 mins) then he starts with the howling and barking. We have no other pets i'm afraid, we have allergies which was part of the reason we chose a Cockapoo (Though by no means all of it) and to be honest we'd like to stick with just Eric at least for a while, though I can understand how some furry company would really ease this problem - We do love how intelligent he is, obedience and toilet training are going brilliantly...


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## Cat 53 (Aug 26, 2012)

My take....would you adopt a newborn baby and then proceed to lock it in a cage and leave it alone? Or put it in a cradle and leave it to cry itself to sleep.....because that in effect is what you are doing. You have picked this puppy, taken him from the home he knew, the people he knew, his mother, litter mates etc and whilst you are there to comfort him mostly during the day, at night you are expecting him to cope alone. Well he is not emotionally equipped to deal with loneliness and and feelings of being abandoned. You are his security now, so be it. Give him what he needs, which is really very simple.....it's your company 24/7. I know that is unrealistic but give him what he needs at night, and he will feel more secure during the day...and if not then get him to doggy day care or something. By making him feel secure as a puppy he will grow into a happy confident dog. And by 'giving in' (as some people might say) you will NOT be creating a rod for your own backs....just the opposite.


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## Peanut (Dec 1, 2013)

The advice you have been given is the correct one. You must not leave him in the crate alone at night. By doing so, you are making him hate the crate and develop issues with separation. It is very simple if you want to solve this issue. 
First, put the crate at night next to your bed. Give him a Kong, and go to bed. He will still cry but it will go in a couple of days. 
Second, during the day, put him in the crate one minute and take him out. Then 2 minutes, then 3...
Always tell him he is a good boy when he goes to his bed. So that he doesn't see the crate as a punishment. 
If you follow these 3 points you will see a change. 
Don't expect miracles by being stubborn with your ways. It will not work and everybody will suffer. 
Good luck!


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## Marzi (Sep 17, 2012)

Eric - what a sweet little chap.
Lucky you to work from home and for you all to be able to spend most of your time together.
When you are all at home and working what is Eric's routine? That is to say - how does the day shape - you get up, he goes out in the garden, had breakfast, has a play goes to sleep - where and for how long?
When he is having his puppy sleeps how long does he sleep for and is he still very aware of you - ie if you get up and move around is his furrily shadowing your every move?

I was very lucky in the Kiki was bred by a very sensible hobby breeder who had the puppies up with her for their wakeful times, but then they were put in the puppy room (hobby room next to the kitchen with a baby gate across, fo their quiet times. Kiki never went in a crate but quickly learnt that the kitchen behind a baby gate was her sleepy space. We would shut her in there when it was her sleepy time and she'd go in her bed and sleep until we let her out 2 and a half to three hours later, same again in the afternoon. Little pups need plenty of sleep - 18 odd hours a day, if they are the sort of pup who sleeps on your foot and moves whenever you move they never get this settled sleep and then they get over tired and increasingly unsettled.
Dot came from a larger breeder and was already crate trained.
So I do not have experience of crate training. I do think that all dogs benefit from feeling safe and secure. Maybe for Eric a bed in your office under your desk is the way to go and a bed in your bedroom at night. 
Is the crate essential - Dot was out of her's by the time she was 7 months. She does chew the odd thing... but she is capable of doing that stealthily when we are all at home 
Don't over exercise little Eric, do make sure he gets calm sleep time, if the crate is vital to your plans they cover it up, get him a snuggle buddie with one of those heat pads that stays warm for 10 hours or so. Have it set up right by you and drop bits of kibble in if he is awake, just tell him sit and drop a bit in - hopefully he'll eventually get in to the habit of watching for the next bit rather than shouting...
It is early days - play with your pup, cuddle your pup, do little training sessions with him and just love, love, love him - it will come right.


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## fabular (Oct 3, 2014)

I have a 13 weeks old cockapoo, as well and thought I might give my two cents to the issue. My little boy is not a huge fan of the crate himself and usually when he is super excited and he wants to play, and I place him in the crate he starts braking and howling. That said when he is tired he sometimes goes in the crate by himself. So I think the first lesson is to make sure that the puppy is really tired before you leave him in the crate (ooohhh puppy energy ). Maybe even place the puppy in the crate during the day when you are around but the puppy is sleepy. 

The next thing I'm doing is to play crate throughout the day: We are next to the crate and he gets a treat whenever I say crate and he goes inside the crate. If I have to leave and he is still a bit hyper I leave his kong filled with something in the crate with, similar to what you are doing. I try to make sure that the crate is his sleeping place and he knows that he gets treats whenever he enters the crate. 

But as I say he still doesn't like it too much -- especially when he is in playtime mode. I guess it is just training where we need to have patients for success .


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## tessybear (May 1, 2011)

I totally agree with Cat and Peanut. He is still very young and will easily feel lonely, scared and abandoned at his age. I kept mine as close to me as I could when they were tiny and they slept next to my bed at night. They very quickly turned into confident, self sufficient dogs who go happily to kennels and day care with no anxiety from being apart from me at all. Good luck!


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## Seamusivy (Oct 10, 2014)

Hello all - just joined this group and found these posts really useful. I'm proper soppy with Grace who's 10 weeks. I've encouraged her to sleep on the bed with us and come and go as she pleases. She does mostly chose to be close to me, but last night or so hoped off the bed to sleep under the chair most of the night. I'm hoping she will grow up confident and happy to be apart from us. I also work from home mostly, but she will need to be left alone eventually. Hoping to work on that in the coming weeks... Right now I get separation anxiety if apart from her!!!!!


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